Sunday, October 23, 2011

Halloween Tour De Home

Just a few of my favorite Halloween decorations for your viewing pleasure!

1. Halloween Plaque courtesy of Suzanne from Just Another Hang Up! I make one for each month.

2. Black Tulle Wreath (Pinterest Project, done!)

3. Fabric Pumpkins. Does the green one look familiar? If you've been with me for awhile, I bet you saw it this summer. The season has finally approached for him to sit on the mantle.

4. Mosaic Jack-O-Lanterns. Quite possibly my favorite decoration for the month of October.

5. Pumpkin Pie Candle: Handmade by Julie and me at our craft day last weekend.

5. Front porch complete with yellow mum, over-priced pumpkin and wreath.

Happy Fall Y'all!

Saturday, October 22, 2011

A Kindred Spirit

Right now I'm reading Angie Smith's book, I Will Carry You, and I would highly recommend it if you're into the whole Christian women's book scene. Brief synopsis: its about the loss of her daughter, Audrey Caroline, and "the sacred dance of greif and joy." I heard Angie speak at the Women of Faith conference in Atlanta over the summer and I fell in love with her. I felt like I could relate to her from the second she walked up onto stage. Her exact words were: "those were the hardest 7 steps I've had to take." {about having up walk up on stage in front of the crowd} She shared about how she had struggled with living in fear for most of her life. One of her greatest fears was public speaking. too.

I just finished a chapter of her book where she tells of being rushed to the hospital when she was 4 years old because she battled with such overwhelming anxiety. Well, for those of you who know me...that's become something I struggle with as well. She talked about how her dad would have to walk her around the house every night before bed so she could make sure the doors were locked, the stove was turned off, and her sister was breathing in her crib. To some of you I'm sure that sounds absolutley absurd, but it struck such a cord with me.

I was a worrier as a kid too. I think mine came from watching too many episodes of Rescue 911. William Shatner's voice still makes me uneasy to this day. I would dream up every possible scenario that could go wrong and play it out in my head. Well- not much has changed. Sometimes my dad would have to go to work at night when I was younger and I would look at the clock and worry myself sick if he wasn't home by the time I had alotted in my head for his arrival back to the house. I would convince myself that he had gotten into a car wreck. Then, I would proceed to "page" him on his beeper (back when those were still around) or call him on his car phone (prehistoric reference again) just to make sure he was okay.

In the same chapter, Angie talked about her trip to Disney World as a kid. When she went into a little shop with stuffed animals she felt guilty for picking out just one because she was so worried about the other stuffed animals who didn't get chosen. Then she cried all the way home because she felt sorry for them. Once again- I can relate.

Much like the guilt over the stuffed animals, mine had to do with the school lunches my dad would pack. I distinctly remember NOT throwing away my empty ziplock baggies because I wanted my dad to see that I had eaten what he packed me. I felt like his feelings would be hurt if I threw away something he carefully selected to go in my lunch. If I had a half-eaten peanut butter and jelly sandwich, it would go back home so he could see that I ate some of it, maybe couldn't quite finish the rest, but was appreciative that he thought to pack me the sandwich. I'm not sure that I could describe it in those words when I was in elemetary school, but that was my thought process. It wasn't that I was trying to show him what a good eater I was, but rather, I felt that he would be hurt if I didnt' eat what he so thoughtfully packed. Looking back- I doubt that was the case, but that's how my little brain worked back then.

Another freak worry of mine was that someone was going to abduct my little sister when she was outside playing. If I thought about it hard enough, I'd have to walk out to the yard and call for her or walk a lap around the neighborhood just to make sure I saw her. Such a little mother hen I was. Oh, and I was also afraid of the garbage man. Laugh it up, Blair and mom. I know y'all remember that.

These days my worries have turned to more adult issues, but they are still there. I am still an anxious worrier. a nutshell, this blog is for those of you who can relate. I know you're out there!

So here's to taking a few deep breaths, remembering that God is in control, and knowing that He wants us to lean on him when our troubles become too much to bear. I've been doing alot of leaning these days :) Trying to atleast.


Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Leftover Spaghetti & Chocolate Chips from the Bag

Yeah, its been that kind of day. A day when re-heated spaghetti and chocolate chips straight from the bag soothe my soul. I wore killer heels at work today. Apparently my feet were not used to being at such and angle for 8+ hours, so I'm paying for it now. My large glass of red wine seems to be helping matters.

So I've been reflecting lately and realizing how much blogging has helped me to notice things in life that would clearly be overlooked if not for my sweet blog, awaiting its next entry. Some days its spaghetti that I have to write about...other days its the grandness of a major revelation. Most days its the spaghetti though. I've always been a journaler, so why not share it with the world? When I was babysitting over the weekend, I ran across this book stashed away on the mom's shelf called: The Happiness Project. The theme ran true to every other book I've ever read on the subject (and that's a lot of books): Find what is FUN to YOU. Simple enough, right? A lot of my friends like to mix and be have read magazines about fashion and Kate watch the listen to the latest songs on the know what happened on Grey's Anatomy last night. I think I'm an old soul. I'm not a "crowd" person. And 3 is a crowd in my book. I'm a one-on-one, let's sit in a booth and talk kind of person. Big T-shirts and crafts and baking are how I prefer to spend my weekend nights. I am fascinated by someone who can march to the beat of their own drum (possibly why I became a special education teacher). Life without a TV is appealing to me. Adoption is on my bucket list. Christian music is my favorite. Yeah- I said it. I love when it rains outside because it gives me an excuse to stay buried up in my room with my books.

I can play the part and be "cool" on the outside, but on the inside, I'm far from cool. Isn't it refreshing to meet someone who is passionate about something other than the cookie cutter makings of life. Some of the most interesting people I know have chosen to hang with what makes them tick, even if it is completely off the grid. So, you read instruction and repair manuals for enjoyment? I can appreciate that.

A bit of a rabbit trail there, but...back to what I was originally talking about: The Happiness Project book. One of the suggestions- # 8: Start a blog. I couldn't agree more. The hardest part, I admit, is being exposed to the world, however, I think that's what a good writer does. No one wants to hear about my perfection, they want to know that I have flaws, too.

"I myself am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions." ~Augusten Burroughs

I read on a blogger friend's website about doing a 30 day theme for writing. For example, "30 days of Letting Go" (that was her topic). I strongly considered taking on the challenge, but I realized this would require me to write EVERY DAY for 30 days. Once a week has been more of my pattern, so I didn't want to put stipulations on my blogging habits and scare myself away! I blog as the inspiration strikes. The idea is still lurking though, so maybe next month.

What is fun to YOU?